Your guy has already proved to you that he possesses a flaw in his character: he is unfaithful.He's done it once, making him more likely to do it again.Perhaps the best advice you can give someone about having a relationship with a married man is telling her not to even start. As my friend Jenna* told me, "You can't help who you fall in love with.The love of your life just might be a married man." Being part of any couple can be challenging and unpredictable, as we all know.As a reasonable, logical person, you might look at how he’s acting and assume that he must want a divorce — otherwise, why would he treat his loved one so badly? If this is how he treats his wife, do you really think he’s going to treat you better?!50% of marriages break up after the discovery of infidelity.
It is up to you to take him back if you want to, but only once the divorce is final. Obviously, it was not a perfect union, but you did invest time and your heart in it, so you need to grieve. While one can argue that you should do this because of ethical reasons: the risk of breaking up a family (particularly if there are children involved), there are other reasons for ending a relationship with a married man.Reasons, in fact, that have more to do with your happiness than anything else.But, no matter how much your guy promises to meet with the divorce lawyer, action is a whole other ballgame.In fact, most studies find that of all the married men who promise to leave their wives, only about one in five actually do.2. In the rare event that the guy you are dating chooses to leave his wife, your relationship still doesn't have a strong chance of survival.